Internet Wisdom

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you.  All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more messed up than you think.

I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones who do.

I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends, because their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves.

I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get arrested and end up in the local paper.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

I've learned to say "F**k 'em if they can't take a joke" in 6 languages.